Today or yesterday, Tony lost his necklace. With the tear drop pendant of Jennifer’s ashes. We are devastated. We have been searching through the whole house, outside, in the car, I called a couple of places we went to this morning, no one has turned it in, if it was found.

My God, this couldn’t have happened at the worst possible time. In five days is her one year anniversary of her death. We don’t know what to do. I am going to take the urn down to where we had her services to see what can be done. But in the meantime, he is without her.

I gave him mine, and after another hour of searching, he decided that he didn’t want to risk losing that one also, when he returns to work. He said it could get caught on a box or something, and didn’t want to risk it.

When he went to put it back on me, his hands were shaking too badly to work the clasp. So I just put it in our room. So neither of us has our necklaces on. But at least we know where mine is for now.

I feel so helpless for him. We both kiss our pendants after our prayers, kind of like kissing her goodnight.